Barry Bonds' Agent Surprised By Lack Of Offers

Apparently, Barry Bonds and the players association feel strongly enough about the lack of interest in his skills that the issue of collusion has come up. It's been inferred that the San Francisco Giants front office may have made a concerted effort to keep Bonds from playing this season.

The players' association has expressed concern to the baseball commissioner's office over the lack of offers to Barry Bonds, asking for additional information about the offseason's free-agent market.

The union did not go as far as to file a collusion grievance on behalf of the 43-year-old outfielder, who remains unsigned since the San Francisco Giants decided not to make him an offer last year and he became a free agent.

"We've raised both general concerns and some player specific concerns," Michael Weiner, the union's general counsel, said Tuesday.

Weiner said the only player the union specifically brought up in its discussions with the commissioner's office was Bonds, who repeatedly has said he wants to play a 23rd major league season.

"I haven't received any offers on Barry since he became a free agent," said Bonds' agent, Jeff Borris.

Management has repeatedly said there has been no concerted effort against Bonds.

"The union notified us that it was investigating potential collusion regarding Barry Bonds and asked for information, and we told them that there was absolutely no collusion with respect to Barry Bonds or any other free agent," said Dan Halem, MLB senior vice president and general labor counsel. "We are aware of no facts which would support a collusion claim regarding Bonds or any other free agents."

Collusion? What about BALCO? Or that Bonds is a player that many feel has put together a tainted record? Certainly, those have nothing to do with it.

Actually, while I would love to believe that the other MLB franchises are freezing Bonds out because of his past actions, I'm also smart enough to realize that at the end of the day professional baseball is a business. Eventually, some team will come calling whether it's because of his power hitting, or because he will draw some fans to the stadium. Bonds will sign on the dotted line, and continue adding to his legacy, for better or worse.

What's That, Bud Selig Gave Barry Bonds Steroids?

Oh man, if even 1/10 of this were true it would be awesome. America's favorite litigious inmate(well, my favorite at least) has filed another lawsuit. This time against Barry Bonds, Bud Selig and...Hank Aaron's bat!. With defendants like that involved who needs Judge Judy for law humor?

Some of the best parts are:

"Barry Bonds and Bud Selig are in a secret conspiracy together to boost television ratings. Mr. Selig has been secretly giving Barry Bonds steroids for over 9 years under the supervision of Sammy Sosa. Mr. Selig on 2 occcations(Dec. 10th 2001, Feb. 6th 2003) met Mr. Bonds at the I-70 Steak 'n Shake, booth #11, made an under the table cream exchange, needles, HGH, as Mr. Bonds provided Mr. Selig 22 thousand for his services.

I knew Sammy was involved with steroids! Though, I had no idea he was instructing Bonds on how to use them. And an "under the table cream exchange" between Bonds and Selig? I don't think my lunch really liked me reading that.

Barry Bonds uses Hank Aaron's corked bat during ballgames. The bat has a secret chamber where Barry stores his HGH supplements.

A bat with secret chambers? Sounds like something Harry Potter would use. I always doubted that he was a non-doping wizard.

Barry Bonds on June 22, 2004, bench pressed me against my will to show off in front of his ballpark buddies. I also witnessed Mr. Bonds selling steroids to nuns.

Well, that explains why we never knew about this, Barry doesn't have any "ballpark buddies". Also, you might want to ask your local Catholic school to test their nuns for 'roids to prevent any danger of them "going yard" on your child with a ruler.

Barry Bonds used Hank Aaron's bat to crack the Liberty Bell.

Ok, the steroid stuff is one thing, but cracking the Liberty Bell?

Mr. Bonds gave mustard gas to Saddam Hussein. Part of the oil for food scandal.

Well, maybe Barry can go to work for GWB when Karl Rove leaves at the end of the month because he obviously knows where the WMD's are.

There are other interesting items in there, so you should check it out.

Oh yeah, any lawsuit filed by someone who calls himself the "White Suge Knight" has to have some truth, right?

Are You Sure You Want To Look Like Him?

MSNBC is running a promotion of sorts where they ask readers that believe they resemble MLB players to submit a picture for the rest of us to ridicule compare.

Currently, there are 20 pictures from brave souls who believe they look like a big leaguer. Of course there are a few "Derek Jeters", an "A-Rod", two(!) Travis Hafners and a guy who I guess could resemble David Justice if he's trying to hide from the authorities by pulling his hat way down(yeah buddy, your chin looks exactly like Dave Justice's).

There are also a few "lesser known" look-a-likes, such as "Bob Wickman" and "Kei Igawa".

Also submitted were photos of look-a-likes that might not exactly be the most popular in certain cities and/or settings. They include Carl Pavano(I really hope that guy doesn't live anywhere near New York), Joe Torre(yeah, the NYC probably isn't so good for you either buddy), Mark Prior(though, the only time you might ever see the real Mark Prior at Wrigley Field will probably be in the stands), Mark McGwire(hit dingers or testify before Congress?!), and of course Barry Bonds(always keep an eye open for an irate Curt Schilling).

Seeing some of those look-a-likes made me wonder if resembling them was really such a good thing. At some point you run a risk of being accosted by people who actually hate the person you look like. After thinking about how crappy your day would be if you got assaulted for resembling a hated rival(like the diehard Red Sox fan that looks like Joe Torre). I thought I would come up with some athletes (current or retired) that you probably wouldn't want to resemble. Feel free to add your ideas in the comments.

NFL
O.J. Simpson: When people applaud O.J. for being asked to leave an upscale steakhouse, you probably don't want to be mistaken for him. Bill Romanowski would have to be included somewhere as well.

NBA
Maybe Kobe Bryant in Vail? Or Ron Artest in Detroit? What about Bill Walton in general?

MLB
Some baseball fans probably harbor a strong dislike for McGwire, Sosa, Bonds, etc. because of the steroid haze that they've helped cast upon the record books. Eventhough he's not really an athlete, I'm sure there are more than a few fans that wouldn't hesitate pimpslapping Bud Selig.

NHL
Todd Bertuzzi's assault on Steve Moore didn't make him anymore popular. Tie Domi made a career out of challenging players on the ice, and there are probably a few guys out there who would challenge a look-a-like on the street or in a bar.

David Ortiz Does Not [Expletive] Care About Steroids

On Monday, Boston Red Sox player David Ortiz discussed his feelings regarding Barry Bonds, steroids, Commissioner Bud Selig and protein shakes in the Dominican Republic.

He doesn't believe that Bonds has ever taken steroids because he has such a "consistent swing", and because he doesn't think that "steroids mentally get you perfect". Also, Oritz would just like you to admit that Bonds is "a bad [expletive]".

Ortiz went on to say that he thinks Commissioner Selig should watch Bonds break Aaron's homerun record in person even if he doesn't want to because if he doesn't people will consider baseball "a joke". And that eventhough Selig is the Commissioner "there's nothing he can do" about the situation.

Ortiz also said that he might have taken steroids in the Dominican Republic while drinking protein shakes.

“I used to buy a protein shake in my country. I don’t do that anymore because they don’t have the approval for that here, so I know that, so I’m off buying things at the GNC back in the Dominican (Republic). But it can happen anytime, it can happen. I don’t know. I don’t know if I drank something in my youth, not knowing it.”

Sure, I could see that happening. Maybe if Yankees' fans ran the smoothie counter.

Though, it is good to know that Ortiz is sure that Bonds hasn't done steroids, isn't sure whether he himself has or not, and thinks that Commissioner Selig not seeing Bonds break Aaron's record in person is what will make baseball a "joke". Yeah Big Papi, that's what will make people think baseball is a "joke".