If Barry Bonds Had Used "The Cream" This Way He Would Have Been Dead Years Ago

Actually, this is about something we shouldn't make fun of, the unforunate death of a high school athlete due to unforeseen consequences. While many high school students are concerned with finding the next kegger, Arielle Newman was winning awards as a runner for Notre Dame Academy on Staten Island. She passed away in early April, and authorities said that after the autopsy was inconclusive they would have to wait for toxicology reports to determine the cause of death.

The results have been made public, and Newman died from an "overdose" of methyl salicylate. That may sound ominous until you learn that it's a key ingredient in sports creams like Icy Hot and Bengay. That's right, she died from an overuse of anti-inflammatory sports cream. The medical examiner said that Newman had used the "topical medication to excess", but added that "it was the first time that her office had reported a death from using a sports cream".

As an athlete, I've used anti-inflammatory creams before. If you're a male athlete you've probably even been "tricked" into putting some on your, ahem, "AJ Daulerios"(it feels like burning!). However, I never once thought that it was a product that could kill me, even if I brushed my teeth with it. Guess I was wrong.

One thing I do ask, though is that before you make your next sports cream joke you think of Ms. Newman. You know, like "hey, how long have you Bengay?" Haha, thank you I'll be here all week. Try the veal.